Angry protestors Occupy the vacant lawn outside MFUJ’s main (and only) office, forcing the band to lock the building down, flee and take refuge in the mountains. G Mod: “Hey, what’s that over there? 99 red balloons?”*Exit, pursued by a bear*

Yes, the countrywide Occupy protesters have turned their sights on your beloved band, MFUJ. Well, they were really after G Mod since he’s part of the dreaded 1%. We’ll get to them eventually. Let’s start with the events that led up to this…this…ugh… Cluster****?  Yeah, I guess.

Obviously the band was dealing with the fallout from the completion of the second Webisode. With no acting segment keeping him busy, Brick focused all his energy on producing a solo project, the Falcons. He began with the song 99

Did you hear the difference between this and MFUJ? Neither did we.

Ah, the rest of the fallout from the video:

- Slate was suspended following his mind fart of an appearance in the recent video. No one knows what the bearded one would do with all his free time. We have one guess: Turducken. The devil’s poultry.

-Tigerman, after finally being given some airtime was promised to have an instrumental segment to bridge the show’s opening and closing acts. He started sharpening his claws and practicing his bass scales only to realize he didn’t actually know nay scales and that he actually just grabbed a sea bass and began clawing away at it. His fur smelled for days.

-Shadow, who has been almost completely ignored has been given the go ahead for the first act of the episode. What can we expect? How about him drumming on a plastic kit, some bad haikus and plenty of guilty monologues about deceiving Brick? Plus cameos from other MFUJ members. Fun stuff, really.

 So as G Mod was trying to plan the third episode, he heard some angry shouts coming from outside the window. He looked outside and saw a large group of protesters occupying his front lawn declaring that G Mod was the enemy  along with the rest of the 1%.

Flustered and confused, G Mod shouted “What’s wrong with being #1?”

They replied by telling him that he and his ‘kind’ controlled the majority of the wealth in the country.

“But,” he replied, “I don’t actually have any money. The band hasn’t exactly made any profit and thanks to some unwise investments on my part, like buying swampland and betting that music would get better this decade, we’re actually in the bottom 1%.”

The protestors would hear none of it and began drumming incessantly outside of his window. He quickly called an emergency meeting of the band in a voice so shrill that it forced every single member to show up just to get him to stop yelling.

“Men! We have been surrounded by an angry mob.”

“What are they angry about?”asked Tigerman as he finished his gazelle burger.

“They think we’re 1%ers.” G Mod said with a downward inflection.

“Say what now?” Brick asked in disbelief.

Shadow followed up with “Did youexpalin to them how poorly our fifth album has done?”

“Yeah, gorilla brain, I did. But they would have none of it. They’re out for blood. Or they just want to get high and camp. I can’t keep track of what these protesters are like.”

“What do we do?” asked Slate.

 “We retreat.” Gmod said as he began gathering his essential belongings together. “I have a safe house in the mountains that’ll keep us…safe.”

“Do we have to?” Brick whined.

“Well, if ya want to take your chances with the 99% you seem to love so much… Be my guest.”

With all discussion coming to a halt, the band members gather their most precious possessions and follow G Mod’s lead. Only Shadow remained behind to watch hold the fort. The other band members emerged out of the building and came face to face with the protesters. Among them was an irate bear in a Che Guevarra T-Shirt offering absolution to all who could offer him a few minutes of paradise.

In a moment of stupendous desperation, G Mod shouted: “Hey, what’s that over there? 99 red balloons?” and surprisingly it worked, giving the band time to run to the old SUV as the angered bear pursued them.

Stay tuned...

MFUJ made the impossible possible: The second MFUJSF Webisode is ready for your viewing pleasure. Bet you didn’t think we’d actually do it, did you? Well we did. So there. Oh and Scary is on his way…

Breaking news from MFUJ’s manager, G Mod:

“The second webisode has finally been filmed, edited and uploaded on the tube for you. Go and watch. Now, you fools! Before it’s too late!”

Reactions from the other band members:

Tigerman was elated at finally getting a speaking role in a MFUJ production since he missed out on the original 2007 web series that starred Brick, Slate, Shadow and G Mod. “This Webisode is fantastic, but as not as fantastic and lovely as you, dear lady that is reading this blog entry. Are you single?”

Shadow was not available for comments since, like in the first webisode, he was not featured in the video. G Mod has confirmed however that Shadow will be featured prominently as will Brick, whether they want to or not.

Brick was very casual about the release of the video. He was more excited about the remastered release of MFUJ’s 2008 concert Live at Gamespot Studio:

“Although some individual tracks were released as individual videos, I’m glad that the whole setlist has finally been compiled and released as a unit. Had we known about our newfound ability of posting clips over 15 minutes long, we would have done a single video. Oh well. A trilogy works fine. Oh, and we’re glad to finally release Intergeddon in its entirety, as it was meant to be heard. We might do a remastered version with instrumentals added to the tracks besides the three that were already songs. I’m busy, busy, busy. Oh and look out for a new song soon now that the second webisode is done.”

Slate was the only one who was unenthusiastic about the new webisode’s release.. “Damn cat got all of my airtime. Now I hear that I won’t even get a part in the next webisode. What the ****?”

 The following is rated TV-MA, the way all real shows should be. **** all that non adult content **** that they try to shove down your ****ing throat. Content moderated by the unimaginative censors who take out their own unhappiness by restricting the fun for the rest of us.

Enjoyed the episode? Of course you did…unless you didn’t. And now let’s end with a ba great band playing an ironically appropriate song at the beginning of their career. I give you Alice in Chains.